Oh, dear friends, you can't imagine what a day I've had! So, picture this: I've been scarfing down beans, onions, and salsa, and drinking tons of cola all day. When night comes, my belly is like a balloon, seriously, I look pregnant. My partner decides to give me a massage on my abdomen to help me release all that trapped gas. My belly is so swollen; I swear they could mistake me for a pregnant woman. The tension on my skin is incredible and I desperately need relief. It's awkward, to say the least.